Positive Speech - a joy to be around!

Hey guys,

I was just chatting to Switch from the Approach (Sebastian Drake's excellent company). We were discussing the Real Man Conference, Amsterdam. Some cool stuff insights came up so I thought I'd share some of my further thoughts on the event with you (for full review of the conference, please see previous post)...

I really loved a lot of the speakers, but others made less of an impression (in terms of content). A number of speakers went for a reactionary, high-controversy approach - speaking out against certain methods or pickup stereotypes (real and imagined). A couple of guys' entire talks were basically anti-x method/mindset.

The guys that really hit home, and whom I mentioned in my previous post, were the speakers that came with their own message - a positive, forward-moving message that did not rely on sensationalism to make an impact with the audience. That is not to say that they didn't criticise and draw contrasts with other methods and ideas - they did. But they did not rely on this to provide the 'bang' of their talk. The 'bang' was in their actual ideas - the form and substance of the lifestyles that they taught.

Perhaps this is a reflection of the personal character of the speakers....What kind of man are you? Some people motivate by guilt-trip, whip at the horse and shout...others inspire, elevate and encourage. Some criticise, bitch and gossip...others praise, bring laughter and positive emotions. What kind of man would you like to be?




There is a quote from the Buddha that says: 'Hatred is never ended by hatred but by love.' The conference in Amsterdam, and this quote, remind me of the times in my life when I've consciously tried to clean up my speech - reducing gossip and criticism and instead striving for giving, encouraging speech habits.


Positive Speech - be a joy to be around!
One of the best ways to replace negative speech habits is to install positive ones. In other words, rather than 'stopping speaking so negatively', I found better success with 'starting speaking positively'.

For example, if I tell you...'DON'T THINK OF A PINK ELEPHANT!'...you're gonna think of a pink elephant right? Because that's the focus of the sentence. But if I say...'THINK OF A FLYING HIPPOPOTAMUS!'...what are you thinking of now? I bet the image of the pink elephant went right out of your head right? It was replaced by something else.

So instead of focusing on 'not talking negatively', try focusing on 'talking positively' and see how much better it works for you. By making an effort to speak well of people and contribute encouragement and value to my conversations, there is naturally less room for the negative stuff. And when you start enjoying the positive feelings that accompany postive speech habits, not to mention the great reactions you get...wow, it's actually a chore to go back!



Try it guys, I bet the changes you see will be really inspiring :)

Laters,

Keys